Back home again 27 settembre, 2013

Dave's company pays for us to return home to the U.S. once a year. We cashed in that ticket sooner than later since Patrick and Lizzie's wedding was scheduled for September 21st. It was a little disorienting to return so quickly after saying good-bye to everyone in July but it couldn't have been for a happier event. We spent a day and a half in Rocky River and were able to check on Scout and our house (both in excellent shape) and catch up with friends.  After 6 weeks of television detox, it was so much fun to sit and watch Survivor with Kris and Jim. I hate to admit that I missed my favorite reality tv show.

Wedding day (photo by Carol Davis)  

Then, we headed up to the dunes of Lake Michigan and the Homestead Resort in Glen Arbor where the wedding took place. A great group of friends and family, including the whole River Rat gang made the trip so we were surrounded by love and laughter. Every event of the weekend was perfect with the highpoint (of course) being the ceremony at the top of the hill overlooking both Lake Michigan and Glen Lake. Seeing both of my children so happy in their relationships makes it a little easier to be so far away.

The recessional (photo by Jimmy Purse)

I had worried that it would be hard to get back on the plane and leave again. The novelty of the big move has worn off and now I know how hard it can be to be so far away from all that is familiar. Maybe I was still in the lovely afterglow of the wedding but I was surprised that I felt like I was heading home....to Como.

Over Switzerland

I must confess that we did make a quick trip to the grocery and shipped ourselves a box of some unlikely things that we can't seem to find here and are missing. So sometime next week, we will receive a cache of a few comfort items like oatmeal, raisins, pancake mix, and ziplock bags. Italians believe that a proper breakfast is a tiny cup of espresso or cappuccino and a brioche (croissant). I miss my daily Cheerios. 

The young people who work in the cafe right below us have been a constant bright spot in our lives here. They never fail to greet us and banter with us in our Engl-italiano. We brought some Great Lakes Beer back for them and while we weren't able to explain the Burning River connotation, they enjoyed some Ohio beer! 

I woke up this morning and knew where I was. That's progress.

Trailing Spouse - 13 settembre, 2013

I am still confused about my official status in this country and maybe Italy is still confused about me. Dave is considered an expatiate which means he is temporarily residing in a country where he is not a citizen. Italy issued him a work visa after we visited the Italian Consulate in Detroit last May, his company submitted a small forest's worth of forms and we dug up original papers including our college diplomas and our marriage license. The company has had two different consultants assist us with 3 visits to official offices here in Italy to apply for official residency. No one speaks English in the offices and the most important task seems to be stamping documents with a huge stamp and adding it to a file folder 4 inches thick with our documents.

I have been told to accompany Dave to each meeting and then at each stop, I am told that I don't need any approvals because I apparently don't have any official status here and am still considered to be a tourist.  Even Dave's company designates me as a "trailing spouse". I have been told that eventually I will be given an Italian identity card but first they need another document from Dave's company that will verify that Dave makes enough money to provide "maintenance" for me. They don't seem to care or want to know that I have my own income and don't have to be a kept woman.

We joke about it but our last visit to the Questura (Police Headquarters) to be fingerprinted and interviewed was quite sobering as we stood in line for over an hour with a group of people from a variety of countries. It was very obvious that we can go through this process with assistance and just feel inconvenienced but for many of the people there, this process was difficult and scary. It seems that the terminology people use is related to socio-economic status; professionals are referred to as expats while laborers are called immigrants. It was humbling because at the end of the day, we are in the same situation as the people we were standing with; we are all waiting for official recognition of our status. Italy, like most European countries has many foreigners trying to enter and as this country struggles with high unemployment and economic problems, the process has become more complicated.

I believe standing in line in a hot room with 30 other immigrants changed the way we think about what we take for granted.

Sacred Places - 08 settembre, 2013

Some are huge and take up a city block and others are so tiny that you can miss them when you walk by. They are the churches, duomos (cathedrals), chapels, monasteries, and niches that are everywhere in Italy. Often, while we are driving I can see a stone church high up on a mountainside with no apparent road or access. It makes me wonder, who built it and how did they get the materials up  to that remote spot? I recently reread Pillars of the Earth because I am in awe of how these places were constructed before cranes and power tools existed.

The Duomo in Como was built over a 300 year period (1396-1770) and took so long that it incorporates three different styles of architecture (Gothic, Renaissance and Baroque). The Basilica of St Fedele which is a block from our house was begun in the year 1120 with a Romanesque design. I believe it is the church bells from St Fedele that wake me up each morning.  As we hike, I am seeing the private little chapels and religious niches that have been built and cared for over the years.

Duomo in Como

St. Fedele (rear)

                                                                               

St. Fedele

                                                                       

St. Tecla in Torno on Lake Como

Duomo in Bergamo

St. Guiliano

Along the trail to Baradello Castle

A touch of class - Bellagio - 25 agosto, 2013

While we are living in Europe, we are going to try to get away one weekend a month to explore the incredible places within reach. We started close to home this weekend and caught the fast (hydrofoil) ferry to Bellagio. When you look at a map or aerial view of Lake Como, it can resemble a man with the torso being the north section and his two legs being the Como branch and the Lecco branch. Bellagio sits right where the two legs come together and has a beautiful view north toward the beginning of the Alps.  We had booked a room in an old elegant hotel that hangs off the hillside overlooking the Lecco branch. It was a short walk to the town center but we spent most of the weekend enjoying the beautiful pool and grounds. Meals were included and formally served so it was a wonderful treat. We got up early on Sunday and hiked on the old stone trails that criss-cross the area before returning for breakfast and a relaxing morning by the pool.

Why we came here - 18 agosto, 2013

Way back in February when Dave came home from work and asked me if I would be willing to move with him to Northern Italy, this is why I said yes.  For the last decade, we have planned vacation trips to places where we could go hiking in the mountains and on trails along beautiful lakes and coastlines. When we were in Wyoming, on a whim I picked up a sign for my office that said "The Mountains are Calling - I Must Go". On many a crazy day at school, I gazed at that sign. So when an opportunity to live 3 miles from the Switzerland border came up, we said yes.

Yesterday was Saturday and we decided to walk up the trail that begins less than an kilometer from our house. (I am trying to think metric now) The sign said 1hr hike which is exactly how long it took us to walk up the old stone steps and trail that leads up the mountain to the village of Brunate. These old trails have been used by mules and people for centuries. Of course there is a cafe at the top so we enjoyed a cappuccino and espresso when we got there.  We were rewarded with a magnificent view of the lake and the city of Como and could even pick out our block. The funiculare also ends up near by so we had the choice of taking it back down. We chose to return the way we had come and found out that a steep walk down is not the easy choice.






















Today we explored the community by bicycle. Since we live inside the walled part of the city, vehicles are restricted so everyone rides bikes. I am amazed by the women in dress clothes and platform shoes who ride their bicycles, even sometimes while talking on their cell phones. I feel
lucky if I stay upright and don't hit any dachshunds or traffic barriers.

(Photo by David Hoopes)

Be careful what you wish for - 15 agosto, 2013

How many times did I say I needed more hours in the day? How often have I wished for some peace and quiet?  I can remember sitting with Kris and Peggy at a photography workshop just last winter saying that if I only had more time, I could really be a better photographer.

Well somehow I woke up this morning with way too much time on my hands. The combination of retiring, moving to a place where I know no one and the temporary absence of technology has placed me in a very quiet, solitary place.  Dave is in Germany for a few days, the entire country of Italy is apparently on vacation and the recording on my non-functioning cell phone is in Italian.

It is hot here and all of the windows are open. The sounds of living so close to other people are startling; I hear toilets flush and baths being drawn. A toddler on the street below is giggling and squealing, bicyclists ring their bell as they come to the intersection and the conversations in the cafe blend together.

I had anticipated loneliness and struggles during the transition period but I didn't know that time would feel different. I feel like I need to be productive and get something done but I don't know yet what that is.  I am not used to that feeling of unscheduled time stretching ahead of me. I am not used to quiet.

Yesterday, I rode a regional bus 2 hours to Bergamo.  My friend Karen (my English teacher and Guidance Counselor in high school) was there visiting with her two nieces from Cleveland. It was nice to sit and enjoy lunch with three women and chat in English!  I am missing my female friends and that easy conversation. It motivates me to work every day to learn Italian so I can find that here.

Visitors already? 8 agosto, 2013

There are very few people we would let come and visit us five days after we moved in but Claudia and Bob are among those few. They were vacationing in Northern Europe and were able to extend their trip and visit us in Como before heading home.  Luckily we are living in a furnished apartment because our belongings haven't even arrived from the States yet. They took the train from the Milan airport and I met them at the Como Borghi station which is an easy walk from here.

(Photo by Claudia Senesac)

On Wednesday, we took the ferry up the lake to Bellagio which is a beautiful and elegant old village in the midlake region. We enjoyed lunch at a lakeside cafe and shopped along the narrow, steeply stepped pedestrian streets. Thursday morning before they left, we took the funicular up the mountain for a great view of the lake and city of Como.

Bob and I share a common interest in photography so he always gets me motivated to learn new things about my camera when we're together. We visited the community market and bought fresh produce and  then cooked our first Italian meal together. There is a lot of creative energy when we are all together.

Having friends here has made our apartment feel more like home. 

Move-in Day 1 agosto (August), 2013

So this is Italy. Alternating between being beautiful and amazing and totally frustrating. We arrived yesterday after smooth, uneventful flights and checked into Dave's work hotel in Saronno. Late in the day we took a commuter train into Milan (Milano) and wandered around to fight off jet lag. There is no agenda which for once feels great. I have decided that the Duomo in Milan is my favorite cathedral - it was a crystal clear day so the gleaming white facade jumped out against the blue sky. We found a neighborhood called Brera where we had a relaxing dinner and shared a cafe table with two young Canadian travelers. It was dark as we rode the train back to Saronno.



We met our apartment owner's real estate agent and our relocation consultant at 10 AM this morning to inspect the apartment and receive the keys. Dave had only previously seen the apartment from the street so it was a relief that he seems very satisfied with the choice. Now it is time to get busy and try to settle in; I wish I could videotape our activities and run it on fast forward for our friends who think we are sitting on a veranda overlooking a Tuscan landscape. We are stymied by the most basic things like how to release the shopping cart from the rack of carts or how to tell whether the detergent we are buying is for dishes or for clothes. We finally figured out that there is a grocery store not too far from here in the pedestrian zone; we just had never seen one underground before and who ever heard of a grocery named "Billa"?  People we are meeting seem to want to help - we just can't communicate. I have to learn Italian in the next week.

It is 11 PM - I have blisters on my feet, it is hot and we are in an apartment with no air conditioning and there is a lady singing really bad, loud Karaoke (in Italian of course) in an outdoor cafe down the street.  But no more getting ready, we are here and it is real life.  Life is good.

Day One - 30 luglio (July), 2013

It was a beautiful morning today in Rocky River, almost too nice to leave.  Somehow I pictured that our suitcases would be lined up at the door on this last day and we would sit on the patio and share a final cup of coffee while we watched Scout chase squirrels.  Instead, we were disposing of leftovers, washing our sheets and writing notes to JB right up until my friend Carol arrived to take us to the airport. I even threw away a pair of underwear that didn't make it into that last load of laundry. Everything looked very neat and organized when we closed the door. Everything that is, except Scout who laid on her bed with her new toy and knew something different was happening today.

Now I am in an airplane with 200 other people somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean. For once, I am enjoying the feeling of nothingness. The last two months have been intense and loud and full of color as I ended my career and said too many good-byes. I am excited about the possibilities ahead and a little anxious about how to make the most of it. I am hoping that this blog will help me find my way.

Finding a place to live - 19 maggio (May), 2013

This is how it started. Dave sent me a message on a very busy school day to let me know that a trip had been set up for me to join him in Italy to look at housing options. It seemed a little extravagant to travel so far for just five days but I was anxious to picture where I would be living. I was amazed by how many people asked me if we were going to be on House Hunters International. I never realized how many people watch HGTV.

Less than a week later, at the Milan airport I passed through customs and looked for a man holding the Parker sign. We smiled at each other as we realized neither spoke the other's language and I followed him to the car. It was a dreary day and as we sped along the highway through an industrial zone, I certainly hoped that I had gotten in the car with the the right man.

Dave was at his new office so I spent the day alone with the relocation consultant Federica as we visited several different communities. She spoke English but in a stream of consciousness that left little room for dialogue. She seemed intent on convincing me what the typical expatriate was looking for. It was raining incessantly and I was told numerous times an hour how incredibly beautiful it had been earlier in the week. I realized quickly that I must get up to speed on this expatriate thing since this what Dave's status will be in Italy. I am really hoping that we can get a glimpse of real Italian life, not just that of the expatriate community.

First task was to decide on the location where we would like to look. The expectation is we will live in an apartment, hopefully one with two bedrooms. Dave has already told them I would like to live in town where I can walk to the market and where we and hopefully our potential guests can access public transportation.  Como and Saronno were already identified as possibilities; I was rooting for Como due to its proximity to the lakes and mountains for hiking and photography. We drove through the rain and I tried to get my bearings.

Como turned out to be a bigger place that I had anticipated. There is a smaller old city that sits on the southern shore of Lake Como with remnants of a medieval wall surrounding it. The city spreads out from there, up the hillsides and away from the lake.  We parked the car and walked through the narrow streets. All I could see were umbrellas and the jet lag was catching up with me.

The next morning, it was raining even harder than the day before when Federica picked me up at the hotel. In Italy, the process of looking at housing is very formal with a set appointment and the agents of both the property owner and the renter present. We had 8 appointments but (thankfully) two were cancelled that day as the units had been rented. Each property was totally different from the others and actually the process did remind me of an episode of Househunters. Two places didn't have a kitchen but I was promised that the landlord would "put one in" for us. Apparently that when people move in Italy, it is common for them to take the kitchen with them!  In one unit, Dave would not have been able to stand up straight because of the sloping ceiling in the living room. Somehow, a view over the train station and public cemetery was not quite the image I had from travel brochures. Perhaps it was the incessant rain that was making everything seem gloomy.

No kitchen!

Luckily, the 5th apartment we visited seemed promising. It was in the pedestrian zone which meant the car would need to be parked 4 blocks away outside the wall but it was spacious with 2 bedrooms and 2 baths, high ceilings and plenty of tall windows. It had a balcony that hung over the street and had an inviting kitchen in place. Even though the current tenant's belongings were strewn about, it seemed like a place we could make our own.  I told Federica that I was pretty sure this was the one.

The next day, Dave was able to join us and visit the various areas we had explored. Finally the rain had stopped so we were able to walk the streets and show Dave how far his daily "commute" to the parking space would be from the apartment. He agreed that Como seemed to be the right spot and was open to the idea of living in a car-free neighborhood.  Dave had only seen photographs of the interior of the apartment but seemed willing to trust my choice. It was a relief to make a decision and be able to picture where we would be living.  On the way back to the airport, I realized that this was really going to happen. Life was about to change in a big way.